老師最近在打小報告...諮懿最近開始有咬人的行為產生。今天有小朋友擋在他前面的時候，他突然咬小朋友的頭。有時候搶不到玩具的時候還會用頭撞別人...哇，脾氣不好的小英雄已經開始"嶄露頭角"。

專家是這摸說滴...

Aggression, hitting, and biting

攻擊、打人和咬人
 

Why it happens

Shocking as it may be to you (and onlookers), aggressive behavior is a normal part of your toddler's development. Still-emerging language skills, a fierce desire to become independent, and undeveloped impulse control make children this age prime candidates for getting physical. 

"Some degree of hitting and biting is completely normal for a toddler," says Nadine Block, executive director of the Center for Effective Discipline in Columbus, Ohio. 

That doesn't mean you should ignore it, of course. Let your toddler know that aggressive behavior is unacceptable and show him other ways to express his feelings.

為何發生--
說起來有點嚇人，但這類攻擊性的行為的確是寶寶正常的發展過程。由於語言能力尚在發展中，心中有股想要宣示自己的獨立自主的渴望，但卻又還沒學會控制衝動，使得這個時期的寶寶開始"動手動腳"。不過專家也表示，雖然是正常的發展過程，但不代表可以忽視。一定要讓寶寶知道攻擊行為是錯的，並教導他能表達情緒的方式。

What to do

如何應對--

Follow up with logical consequences. If your child gets into the ball pit at the indoor play center and immediately starts throwing the balls at other kids, take him out. Sit down with him and watch the other kids play, and explain that he can go back in when he feels ready to join the fun without hurting other children. Avoid trying to "reason" with your child, such as asking him, "How would you like it if he threw the ball at you?" Toddlers don't possess the cognitive maturity to be able to imagine themselves in another child's place or to change their behavior based on verbal reasoning. But they can understand consequences.

讓他知道後果是什麼---
舉例來說，如果寶寶進了球池後就開始拿球丟其他的小孩，這時候就要立即將他抱出來。跟他坐在一旁看著其他小朋友玩球，一邊跟他說明當他準備好跟其他小朋友和平相處時，他就能繼續去玩。絕對不要跟寶寶"講道理"，例如不需要跟他說: "如果他也這樣對你，你應該也不會喜歡吧!"這時期的寶寶沒有設身處地的能力，也不會經由被說教來改變行為。但是他們能理解什麼叫做"後果"。

Keep your cool. Yelling, hitting, or telling your child he's bad won't get him to curtail his behavior — you'll just get him more riled up and give him examples of new things to try. In fact, watching you control your temper may be the first step in his learning to control his.

保持冷靜---
對他咆嘯、動手打他或是跟他說他很壞，都不會減少他的錯誤行為。你反而讓他更生氣，同時也給他下次可以依樣畫葫蘆的錯誤劇本。事實上，藉由觀察你控制情緒的方式將是他學習控制自己的第一步。

Set clear limits. Try to respond immediately whenever your toddler is aggressive. Don't wait until he hits his brother for the third time to say, "That's enough!" He should know instantly when he's done something wrong. Remove him from the situation for a brief time-out (just a minute or two is enough). This is the best way to let him cool down, and after a while he'll connect his behavior with the consequence and figure out that if he hits or bites, he ends up out of the action.

要有明確的規範---
當他攻擊別人時要立即做出反應。不要等他第三次出手打哥哥的時候才說 "好了，不可以了!" 他應該在做錯事的當下就知道。把他從案發現場帶走，給他1~2分鐘冷靜的獨處。這是學習冷靜的最佳方式，且一段時間後，他將能將錯誤行為與後果聯想在一起，也會理解當他打人或咬人時，他的下場就是在某處動彈不得。
 

Discipline consistently. As much as possible, respond to each episode the way you did last time. Your predictable response ("Okay, you bit Billy again — that means another time-out") will set up a pattern that your child will recognize and come to expect. Eventually, it will sink in that if he misbehaves, he'll get a time-out. Even in public, where you may be mortified by your child's behavior, don't let your embarrassment cause you to lash out at him. Other parents have been there too — if people stare, simply toss off a comment like "It's hard to have a 2-year-old," and then discipline your child in the usual fashion.

處罰要一致---
盡量讓每一次的處置方式都跟上次一樣。因為你的反應是可以預測的，因此可以建立某種模式 (嗯，又咬人...那就再去旁邊反省)。當寶寶能辨識這個模式，他就學會預測。久而久之，他自然會理解只要不乖，就要去旁邊反省。就算是在公共場合，也不要因為不好意思，而讓寶寶逃過懲罰。當過父母的都會懂，如果有人觀看，就簡單速速地用 "帶兩歲的小孩很辛苦" 帶過，然後用老方法來處置一切。
 
Teach alternatives. Wait until your toddler has settled down, then calmly and gently review what happened. Ask him if he can explain what triggered his outburst. Emphasize (briefly!) that it's perfectly natural to have angry feelings but it's not okay to show them by hitting, kicking, or biting. Encourage him to find a more effective way of responding — by "talking it out" ("Tommy, you're making me mad!") or asking an adult to help.

Make sure your child understands that he needs to say he's sorry after he lashes out at someone. His apology may be insincere at first, but the lesson will sink in. The passions of toddlerhood can overtake a child's natural compassion sometimes. Eventually he'll acquire the habit of apologizing when he's hurt someone.

教導方法---
當寶寶安靜下來後，心平氣和地跟他討論事情的經過。問問他為何動怒。很簡潔地跟他說生氣很正常，但是傷害別人就不應該。鼓勵他尋求更有效的解決方式--直接告訴對方或者請大人幫忙都可以。一定要讓寶寶知道他打了人之後要說對不起。他的道歉或許一開始並不誠懇，但久之他就能懂其中的道理，他會養成跟別人道歉的好習慣。
 
Reward good behavior. Rather than giving your child attention only when he's misbehaving, try to catch him being good — for example, when he asks to have a turn on the swing instead of pushing another child out of the way. Praise him lavishly for verbalizing his desires ("That's so great that you asked to have a turn!") and, in time, he'll realize how powerful words are. Then give him a time-in by offering to push his swing or playing with him afterward.

給獎賞---
與其當寶寶搗蛋的時候才來關心他，倒不如在他乖乖的時候多下些功夫。例如當他要求排隊玩盪鞦韆而非一把將其他小孩推開時要大肆地讚美他一番。把他的好行為說一遍，例如 "你說要排隊真的好棒喔!"，很快他會理解用說的比較有用。接下來可以給他一段兩人時光做為獎賞，例如幫他推推秋千或者之後跟他一起進行其他活動。
 
Limit TV time. Cartoons and other shows designed for young children can be filled with shouting, threats, even shoving and hitting. Try to monitor which programs he watches, particularly if he seems prone to aggressive behavior. When you do let your child watch TV, watch it with him and talk to him about situations that arise: "That wasn't a very good way for him to get what he wanted, was it?" (The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children under the age of 2 watch no TV at all.)

減少看電視的時間---
一些給小孩看的卡通或表演可能不斷出現大叫大罵、威脅恐嚇、或甚至推擠敲打。要留意他所觀看的節目，尤其當他有惡意對待別人的傾向時。當你真的要讓寶寶看電視時一定要跟他一起看，並且跟他講解情境，例如 "他用那種方式得到想要的東西並不好，對不對?" 註: 美國小兒科學會建議兩歲以下的幼童不該觀看任何電視節目。
 
Provide physical outlets. You might find that unless your toddler gets a chance to burn off his abundant energy, he's a terror at home. If your child is high-spirited, give him plenty of unstructured time, preferably outdoors, to let off steam.

提供發洩精力的管道---
你應該有發現，除非能夠消耗掉寶寶旺盛的精力，否則他在家中就是個恐怖份子。如果你的寶寶總是情緒高亢，最好帶他到戶外，給他大量活動時間來消耗他的能量。
 
Don't be afraid to seek help. Sometimes a child's aggression requires more intervention than a parent can provide. If your child is unusually aggressive for more than a few weeks, if he seems to frighten or upset other children, if he attacks adults, or if your efforts to curb his behavior have little effect, talk to your child's doctor, who may in turn recommend a counselor or child psychologist. Together you can determine the source of the behavior and help your child through it. Remember, your child is still very young. If you work with him patiently and creatively, chances are that his pugnacious tendencies will soon be a thing of the past.

不要害怕尋求協助---
處理寶寶的攻擊行為有時候單靠父母親是不夠的。如果寶寶已經有好幾週都有侵略性的行為，或似乎有威脅其他小朋友的狀況，或者他會打大人，再或者是你的遏止效果有限，這時候都該跟你的小兒科醫生談談。他可能可以推薦你諮詢人員或小兒心理學專家。藉此你們可以共同討論出導致錯誤行為的的緣由並能幫寶寶走過這一切。切記，寶寶來日方長，如果你能有耐心、有方法，他那逞凶鬥狠的個性將很快銷聲匿跡。
 

http://www.babycenter.com/0_aggression-hitting-and-biting_11550.bc?scid=mbtw_post14m_3w&pe=MlVDcXl1OHwyMDEyMDUyNA..